Synopsis:
This movie intercuts between two eras: the Civil War, and the present. In the past, Major Parker is a death-hungry warmonger, who enjoys killing any and all who get in his way. At first he slaughters the Native Americans, claiming to be protecting the settlers, but he soon turns to murdering his own people, and Parker's superiors finally take note. His fun comes to an early end at the hands of a judge and jury...
In the present, a group of kids is practicing magic, and they accidentally unleash the spirit of said Major Parker. He kills a couple of them and takes off to reak havoc on the ancestors of the men who convicted him. The gang recruits a former teacher and the local sheriff to help try and defeat the crazed spirit and his awesome neon marker-lasers (?).
Year:
1992
Copyright:
1992
Tagline:
None!
It was Wolf Zombie who gave us the pleasure of viewing this gem.
Major Parker - Jack Dunlap
Powell - Keith DeGreen
Marisa - Anne Coffrey
Jane - Danielle Frons
Matt - Roger Gentry
Adam - John Reidy
Donald - Norman Stone
Captain Cool - 3.5 out of 10
Hmm..This is how much I like this movie. I don't remember that much about it *laugh* Though I do remember the cwazy magician man. That broad was fugly though, yeeeickth! The ending was a cool, I don't like happy endings in most horror movies, that's dumb. It's not a tra-lalala movie, it's horror damnit!!! The effects were a bit random. Neon markers, why the hell not I say! Of course ANY man-ass will never help any movie. Bad enough for it to be in a movie that sucks. I agree with Fox, you'll get some laughs, however, as with pain or alcohol, it wears off. Only check out as a last option.
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Hmm..This is how much I like this movie. I don't remember that much about it *laugh* Though I do rem ...
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Neon magic marker special effects - yes
Happy ending - no
Continuity - no
Horse woman - yes
Abnormally large intestines - yes
Off center credits, LITTLE annoying.
Man-ass!
Crack lighter.
Extreme close-up!
Is that a clown car? How many people are in there?
Getting shot makes you do sign language?
Argh, jiggling man-ass!
Hey, you're at the door...run away!!!
Pointless still images montage!
Extreme close-up!
The gun is passing gas...
Special FX in this are...well, let's just say; markers?
Bitch slap!
Kyle - "I've read every, well one or two books on the subject."
Donald - "Even ol' Aleister Crowley didn't touch a clavical after the Moroccan fiasco!"
Mr. McGuire - "I'm so glad you married me."
Kyle - "Get off my back dammit!"
Kyle - "We don't have any time!"
Donald - "There is philosphy in that remark that I would rather not explore at this time."
Sheriff - "If I get AIDS it's your ass, understand?"
Low rental. A good bit of death, with a lot of (magic-marker) magic, and lots of Civil War re-enactments. Just not much else!
3.5 out of 10 (Based on 1 ratings, 
