Someone is kidnapping people and draining their blood! It's a local mystery, and a pair of scientists are close to unraveling the clues left behind with some blood samples.

Well, not really. They basically do 'research' and discover basic clues before the entire plot falls into their laps. It's then up to them to save the world from the evil Druid clan that is trying to resurrect Queen Onhorrid through wooden acting and annoying microphone feedback!
Despite the gut-wrenching, bowel moving cover depicting horrible acts of pitchfork attacks, the Blood Farmers in the movie actually work by squirting a blinding liquid on their camera, uh EYES, and drain the blood through a device that sounds like someone ingesting a milkshake through a coffee straw.

Will our team of scientists be able to figure out the puzzle in time to stop Onhorrid and save Jenny? Will the apocalyptic battle between good and evil leave anyone alive behind? Will the color of the sky ever stay one color? Proooooooobably not.

Dr. Anderson - Norman Kelley
Jenny - Tanna Hunter
Don - Bruce Detrick
Creton - Paul Craig Jennings
Egon - Jack Neubeck
Sontag - Richard Erickson
Queen Onhorrid - Cynthia Fleming

Director - Ed Adlum
Written by - Ed Adlum & Ed Kelleher

Pointless nudity - no
Random violence - yes
Uppercuts - no
Bad dubbing - yes
Continuity - no

Hobble faster grandpa!
Can you at least look at her when you talk to her?
Nice try on the 'artistic' transition.
Ok, can someone shoot the cameraman?
Buildup, buildup...and nothing.
Why did he break his hand to pick up the phone?
Random song ... "Raft made of stars?"
How did Jenny change clothes so quick?
Apparently it's midnight upstairs and noon downstairs.
He just broke the 4th wall! Bastard!

Don - "I don't necessarily mean murder in the natural sense."

Jenny - "How would you like your eggs?"
Don - "Scrambled, like you."

Chief - "The best thing to do is to leave the rest to us. Fi-"

Kinski - "I'll have a .... Bloody Mary!"